3-Minute Guru
Monday, January 3, 2011
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Teach kids to share credit for ideas
BY SHERRY THOMAS
Do you have that co-worker who somehow ends up smelling like a rose because of all the great ideas that he or she brings to the table? Only problem is - the ideas are yours!
In the acting world, we have a term called "scene stealers." They're the actors who repeatedly try to outshine the other actors. They do things that are distracting, things that bring the focus onto themselves.
In the etiquette and life skills world, I call these people "credit stealers." They're not taking your identity and making purchases, but they are taking your ideas and representing them as their own. Every time you have a brainstorm of an idea, that idea somehow gets tossed about behind closed doors or (the audacity!) in open corporate forums with no credit given to you.
It's a great way for a co-worker to alienate him or herself from fellow co-workers and managers but they don't care.
To the bysitter, it seems that credit stealers get kudos and praise and even promotions while fellow co-workers suffer in silence, not knowing how to handle such a delicate situation.
Credit giving is being honest, while credit thieving is laced with deceit. Believe it or not, this happens around the country on playgrounds and in classrooms, as well. The credit 'non-givers' are only smaller and younger.
The shaping of the credit giving thought process begins early. As parents, this is a life lesson that is often inadvertently overlooked.
Toss this in with your honesty lectures on not telling a lie and with sharing toys (share credit) and being fair.
It's an important leadership skill.
The child who says, "Mary had this great idea," or "It was Mary's idea, and we added to it" is the one who, simply by that statement, has earned a place of respect.
That child has established authority - all without realizing it, and all with a few simple words.
Sherry Thomas is president of The Palm Beach School of Etiquette and Life Skills. Visit the school's website and follow her on Twitter @EtiquetteQueen.
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